What Doctors Really Mean

As doctors, we have also our imperfections. We also have moments where we really don’t mean what we say to our patients or we just don’t know what we’re faced with. We make up our own styles in dealing with the situation, and this article is a funny interpretation of our statements.

"ANONG PROBLEMA NATIN...?"
He has no idea and is hoping you'll give him a clue.

"PAANO NA NGA ULIT NAG-UMPISA YAN...?"
I'm stalling for time.

"KUNG DI MAWALA ANG SAKIT AFTER A WEEK, BALIK KA ULIT."
I don't know what it is. Maybe it will go away by itself.

"(TO SECRETARY), PAKI-HANAP NAMAN MEDICAL RECORD NI MAM."
I want to see if you've paid your last bill before spending anymore time with you.

"MERON AKONG good news and bad news."
The good news is, I'm going to buy that new BMW. The bad news is, you're going to pay for it.

"KAILANGAN KAYO MA-OPERAHAN AGAD."
I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next month but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures itself.

"MAY MGA IPAPAGAW AKONG lab tests. DITO NA PARA MAKITA KO AGAD RESULTA."
I have a ten percent commission from the lab.

"OBSERBAHAN NATIN."
Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that really needs to be cured.

"MAY BAGONG GAMOT AKO NA IBIBIGAY SA YO."
I'm writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig.

"TIIS LANG, MEDYO MASAKIT ITO."
Last week two patients almost bit off their tongues.

"INUMIN MO ITONG GAMOT AT MAWAWALA YAN."
The drug company slipped me some big bucks to prescribe this stuff. Hope it works...

"OKEY NAMAN, WALA AKO MAKITANG PROBLEMA."
Rats! I guess I can't buy that new beach condo after all.

"MERON PA AKONG IPAPAGAWANG LAB TESTS PARA MAKASIGURADO."
I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this on.